In my Torah portion, Acharei Mot, after the two sons of Aaron died, the Israelites are taught how to be sorry for their mistakes, how to be better and be forgiven by others, themselves and God. Aaron brings two goats to his Israelite community as a sacrifice offering. One goat is to be killed to honor the Eternal God and the other goat is for purifying the Israelites sins. As Aaron puts his hands on the goat marked the sins, Aaron says all the transgressions and sins that the Israelites committed. Then he sends the goat out into the wild. You might think why would Aaron send the second goat alone? I think Aaron sent out the goat because when he whispers all his sins into the goat, the sins are transferred to the goat and are no longer on Aaron or the Israelites. Have you ever heard the word scapegoat? This is the origin of that word. In the Merriam-Webster dictionary, a scapegoat is defined by a goat upon whose head is symbolically placed the sins of the people after which he is sent into the wilderness in the biblical ceremony for Yorn Kippur or one that bears the blame for others. This ritual is also known as a purgation ritual. Purgation is the act of purifying something or someone. Obviously in this situation Aaron is not cleaning something but rather Aaron is wiping his slate clean from all his wrongdoings.

This practice might sound very familiar to you. Let me explain. During Yom Kippur, the Jewish Day of Atonement, we do purgation rituals by not eating for the day, also known as fasting. This is a time for us all to think about our sins and all our wrongdoings. On Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year, AND the secular New Year, we make resolutions to do better in the future. These are times we are trying to move past our sins and be better for the future. But doing an act of purgation doesn't have to be that complicated like fasting on Yom Kippur. Everyone makes mistakes and hurts people all the time. We can't all fast every time we make a mistake. An easier way to release our sins is to SAY sorry, BE sorry AND do better in the future.

There have been times when I have said unkind things to my siblings. For example, when we are in the car I can sometimes be annoying to Presley and Casey by talking about things they aren't interested in. Doesn't everyone want to hear about Magic the Gathering? The latest Super Mario Games? Or exponential functions? Well,... I guess not. I know it bothers them when I talk about things they don't like because they ask me to stop but sometimes, I don't listen. I have said sorry to them, but that isn't enough. I have to DO better. When you know better, you do better. In the future, I am going to be thinking about how I have acted in the past and show them that I really am sorry. I will do this by taking the time to acknowledge their opinions and talk about things they are interested in, so they won't be annoyed.

Part of the reason people say and be sorry is to heal themselves, others, and the world. One part of becoming a Bar mitzvah is doing Tikkun Olam. That is Hebrew for, "repairing or healing the world". For my Tikkun Olam project, I am helping to heal the world by raising money to help heal kids in the hospital by providing them their own ukuleles and music therapy. Like my Torah portion mentioned, it is important to heal yourself and others by saying and being sorry. Saying sorry can heal others as well as healing yourself. Music can do the same thing for people, too.

Music is healing because sometimes when I am stressed or mad, I listen to music or play on my guitar. Music has a way of distracting me from anything that is bothering me and helps me feel better. I would like to share an original song that I wrote to explain some examples of saying sorry and being sorry.

Say Sorry Be Sorry By Ryder Tiplitsky

Have you ever felt bad about the choices you've made 

Living in darkness, hiding in shade

No one is perfect, doing the best we can

But sometimes we hurt when we get mad.

With unkind words, hurting your friends

Disrespecting your parents, things you want to mend

Say Sorry- it  can open your mind

Look ahead and leave the rest behind

When you're sor ry- you can heal from with in

Learn from the past and then begin

It's not over when you say those words

Your actions will speak louder- you gotta let them be heard

When you make better choices- then you'll know

You can move forward and it will help you grow

Be Sorry- it can open your mind

Look ahead and leave the rest behind

When you're sorry- you can heal from within

Learn from the past and then begin

Don't look back, look ahead

Take what you learned in your heart and head

Learn from the past and the wrongs you've done

You can make them right one by one

Be Sorry- it can open your mind

Look ahead and leave the rest behind

When you're sorry- you can heal from within

Learn from the past and then begin***

Before I end, I want to thank all of the people that helped get me here today. Thank you to everyone at Temple Jeremiah for working with me and teaching me how to love and appreciate Judaism. Thank you to my great friends and family friends who have all supported me and are joining us today in person and on zoom. I also want to thank my aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents and my amazing parents for supporting me, listening to me practice, and helping me celebrate this big day. Last, but definitely not least, I want to thank the most important people in my life- my brother Casey and my sister Presley. They make me smile, they make me laugh and they always know how to heal me.

Baruch atah adonai, may you be surrounded by music, family, friends and forgiveness. May they bring peace, love and healing into your heart, into your home and into your life. Amen.

About the Author: Ryder is a current 7th grader who had his Bar Mitzvah on April 24, 2021. He loves his grandma's matzo ball soup! Ryder and his family belong to Temple Jeremiah in Northfield. Ryder loves to spend his summers at camp at OSRUI!