First Jewish apartment toolkit

Moving children into their first apartment is a rite of passage parents both dream about and dread.

Of course, we want our children to grow, thrive, and become independent humans. However, it’s hard not to be nostalgic. Weren’t we just changing their diapers, and now we’re unpacking their boxes? Weren’t we the ones telling them where to place the fork and knife when they set the table, and now they’re directing us which drawers to use for the very few pieces of cutlery they own? How can our children host friends for Shabbat dinner if they only have a total of two forks, knives, and spoons? Speaking of Shabbat dinners, where’s that Kiddush cup Great Aunt Esther gave them for their b’nai mitzvah?

Do our children even have what it takes to create a Jewish home? Oy vey!

We need to ensure the future of the Jewish people in this apartment stat. Best to entice, rather than enforce, with this digitally distracted generation. A Jewish toolkit seems like the perfect housewarming gift to make the traditions alluring instead of obliging.

Mezuzah

A mezuzah on the doorpost signals you’re entering a Jewish home. It’s an essential toolkit component, along with the parchment that goes inside, containing the Shema, the central Jewish prayer.

Kiddush cup

A vessel for wine could be just the thing to capture your young adult’s Jewish heart. (Feel free to throw in kippot, too.)

What good is a Kiddush cup without the wine? We can’t control what our kids do, but we still have a modicum of say over what they receive. Giving them a kosher wine-of-the-month club membership will ensure they have a bottle per week for blessings and imbibing.

Shabbat candles

Before Kiddush, we welcome Shabbat with candle lighting. Place a pair of candlesticks inside that Jewish toolkit. To guarantee they’re always filled, you can sign your child up for a candle delivery subscription on Amazon.

Challah cover

Challah is arguably the best part of any Shabbat meal, and including a challah cover in the toolkit may help lure the braided bread onto your child’s table. For extra Jewish parent brownie points, you can send challah from the local bakery, or, if you’re geographically close by, deliver a homemade one.

Jewish books

We’re the people of the book, and having a Jewish library can be a meaningful way to establish a Jewish home. Consider including a book or two in your child’s toolkit. From traditional texts like a Tanakh or Siddur to more modern teachings like those of Rabbi Jonathan Sacks or Elie Wiesel. If your child prefers fiction, the list of Jewish authors is robust.

Food can be the love language in many Jewish homes, and if cooking is your child’s thing (or even if it isn’t), there are plenty of cookbooks chock full of recipes perfect for the toolkit. They can bring back childhood memories and help to make new ones.

Israel flag

The attacks of October 7 in Israel and increased antisemitism around the globe have given rise to a new sense of Jewish pride, including the displaying of Israeli flags.

Chanukah menorah and candles

A chanukkiah (Chanukah menorah), including candles for the eight nights, seems like a toolkit necessity.

Just don’t overdo it. The toolkit is great for helping our children get started in their independent Jewish lives. But let’s be real: our incentive as Jewish parents is enticing them home for the holidays!

Mimi Sager Yoskowitz is a writer and former CNN producer raising her family on the North Shore. She’s a current trustee of the Jewish Women’s Foundation and former Young Women’s Board member. Connect with her on Facebook or Instagram @mimisy6.